I’m dirty and tired and there’s a blister on my left heel. I have soil under every last one of my fingernails, and I think I even got sand in my vagina (don’t ask). Even though I was inside a large metal building all day, my face feels sunburnt. I’m already dragging dark brown boogers […]

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I’m trying to draw out my morning as long as possible. I’m still in my pajamas, a little funky from sweating while I slept, sipping my mineral water and working my way through a slice of Marie Callender’s sour cream apple pie (a lie, since the recipe doesn’t contain any sour cream whatsoever). The pie […]

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