All That You Can Leave Behind

One of the iffy parts of the fair for me has always been running into people I grew up with. I don’t have an aversion to bumping into old friends and acquaintances. I have a problem with the awkward conversations and inevitable line of questioning that ensues. Things like marital status, number of children, whether or not you own a home, what you’re doing for a living, etc. The one thing I can always trump people with is my job. I have a damn good job at a massive company making very good money. Throw “financial analyst” in someone’s face and see what comes back. It’s refreshing. I may be single and lacking in my own trail of uterine dumplings, but I can afford shit without the use of credit cards or loans. Eat that, yo.

Thankfully I never run into any ex boyfriends. Not that this would be an issue either. I’m a completely different person from the one they dated (read: controlled) back in the day and often times the change is shocking enough that they don’t even have the time to openly judge. But still. Standing there trying to converse with a guy to whom you’ve given numerous blow jobs and seen naked way too many times to count while his wife is standing there with him is just…weird. Because you know she’s seen him naked too and probably attempted a few blow jobs of her own. And that idea just ooks me out. Especially with certain exes. Ew.

So far I haven’t run into anyone I know from my youth, save for family friends. I spend considerably less time at the fair than I used to, and I think that helps. Plus I’ve learned to regard crowds at the fair with an air of indifference, so there’s a good chance that just like Waldo, these people I know are standing there in the crowd and I’ve just never noticed. I’m okay with that.

Chris Isaak Marketing Fail

While waiting to open my building this morning, I took to reading the 20+ page insert that the fair printed and had delivered in all of the area newspapers. It contains many articles about the various acts performing at the fair this year, including a lovely article on Chris Isaak.

Now…I may not be that terrific when it comes to remembering certain things. It’s random how my mind choses to forget the simple shit like taking the garlic bread out before it burns or dropping off the rent check, while it retains mindless crap like how to calculate derivatives or the names of every episode of M*A*S*H. But I’m pretty sure I’m fairly well-versed in Chris Isaak’s catalogue.

Which is why I was mildly surprised to read in this article that he was touring to support his recently-released greatest hits album.

Now if you clicked through that link, you may have noticed the release date of that album…May 9, 2006. What the fuck, May Fair? What. The. Fuck.

The poor man tours to promote his brand spankin’ new album, Mr. Lucky

, and you can’t even get the information right? I mean, honestly. I know you were given a press kit to work with. You had to have received something from his promoters. And even if you hadn’t, couldn’t someone have CHECKED? Google that shit, people. He’s got a website, a MySpace page, a Facebook page, a Wikipedia page…honestly, take your pick. The information is out there. How embarrassing that you can’t even show a local boy some common courtesy.

On a related note…I was really amused to read that the song “Somebody’s Crying” was described by the writer as a “sad ballad”. They referred to “Wicked Game” by almost the exact same description. Um. OK. Wait, what?

*facepalm*