I weep for lack of internet

This is a sad sad day in my life. Sad and vaguely pathetic. Hell, it’s not even vaguely. It’s VERY pathetic. For today, I am without a DSL connection on which to operate our server. The server which houses all our websites. This webiste. The website for which I’m WRITING THIS BLOG. So you see, it is very sad and pathetic. I am blogging for nothing.

How am I accessing the internet, you ask? Well, there’s a kicker to it. We only lost the third DSL line. Heh. I heard your eyeballs pop out and roll across your desk. Yes, you read that correctly. THIRD DSL LINE. We have three. See, when you have two active internet users and a gaming server and a web server, plus a houseguest every weekend who also remains active on the internet during his stay…three DSL lines is nothing. In fact, it’s lacking, if anything. There’s no excess here. Every kilobit of bandwidth is used on a daily basis. Hell, we’d love to have more bandwidth, but I think SBC would seriously lose their fucking minds if we asked to have a fourth DSL installed.

So how did we lose this third DSL line? Oh, let’s just call it a billing snafu which I’m sorry to say is probably my fault. But not without good reason! If SBC could bill shit properly in the first place, we wouldn’t have this issue. I’ll just leave it at that.

How come we don’t just change the servers over to one of the other DSL connections? Because, doofwad, that would inhale roughly 95% of my precious web-surfing and Trillian bandwidth. You ever tried chatting and loading websites with only 5% of a 6mb/1.5mb net connection? It’s mildly irritating at the least. Most of the time it’s practically unusable. As it is, the game server has been moved to my DSL connection, and it’s putting a strain here or there, but it’s workable. If the web server were also moved to my connection, I would have to learn cuss words in other languages to properly vent the rage that would build up inside of me from the ass-dragging page loads and line-dropping AIM chats.

I am not a patient person when it comes to the internet.

For right now…the web server is officially down for the count. Which is fine…it needs a rest and to be cleaned and fiddled with. Jamie and I will be tossing a coin sometime this week to find out which of us gets stuck with that arduous task…

How long will the third DSL line be down? Fuck if I know. SBC moves at a snail’s pace with everything they do. Their internet connections are faster than they are. They should replace their customer service reps with sentient T3’s.

In the meantime, I’m still going to blog my little heart out. That way when the server, site, and blog all come back up in all their glory, you’ll have more shit to read than you’ll know what to do with. In fact, you’ll probably get dog-ass tired of reading and avoid my site altogether. Hey, no skin off my ass.