A fool’s paradise in every Inbox

Ok people. Work with me here.

When you get an e-mail saying that your service provider is going to allow cell phone numbers to be purchased by telemarketers, and you know damn well that telemarketing to cell phones is illegal…why is it that you insist on forwarded the damn e-mail to everyone in your address book about this terrible tragedy about to befall us instead of using that lump three feet above your ass to think through this a little.

I’m not a 100% bona-fide skeptic. There’s quite a bit of optimist in me, thinking that the world is warm and fuzzy and nobody would ever ever lie to us! But even the optimistic Amanda has enough common sense built into the creases and folds in my brain to think twice about this kind of crap before burdening everyone else with it, thereby avoiding causing mass panic among the less-fortunate (in terms of general hoax knowledge).

There are a lot of common hoaxes. You can usually spot them galloping at you from a mile away (although I do recognize that this can be hard sometimes with your head shoved that far up your ass) and divert them with a well-timed trip to Snopes or Symantec’s Virus Hoax website. I mean, really…anything that sounds remotely fishy or not entirely normal should send up red flags within a few minutes of reading the e-mail, if not instantly. All it takes is a click on your Favorites folder and another click on the debunking link of your choice, and BAM! Your mystery is solved and you can go about your day secure in the knowledge that you helped to stop yet another stupid internet hoax from spreading to the unwashed masses.

All this is really simple to do. So…why is it that people still forward on all this crap as though they’re really seriously taking the message as absolute cannon? Baby Jesus cries every time some dumbass forwards internet hoaxes, people. Why do you think I will (not very nicely) reply to your e-mail and include everyone else you sent it to, providing a link to the webpage detailing the hoax. It’s my rather polite way of saying YOU DUMBASS…but everyone still gets the point.

I really recommend people take a moment (or an hour) to browse Snopes and bone up on your favorite internet hoaxes and spoofs. There’s even non-internet stuff on there as well. Why, I bet you’ll even discover stuff you’ve thought was real all along and now you feel like a giant boob for believing in Tinkerbell and Neiman Marcus cookie recipes…