Cell phones are the work of the devil himself

So my cell phone took a total shit on me today. I tried to answer it three times and all three times it hung up and reset. Then when I was able to accept a call, the phone squealed like a banshee as I tried to hang up! Fucking piece of cheap Japanese shit, I swear.

Now it seems to be working fantastic. It’s sitting there, looking all tiny and cute and glowing in the dark (no, seriously, the trim on the faceplate glows in the dark. WTF?). Technology really sticks it in and breaks it off sometimes.